Why I Have Been Absent

I wish I could tell you my blog absence was because I was on an exciting vacation.
That I was writing a novel and had to spend time away.
That I was a super spy and on an international mission doing something top secret.
That I took a week off to do just what I want to do.  
However, none of that was true.
Come Thursday afternoon, lots of pain.  
Visit to Urgent Care and a diagnosis of:  shingles (pre rash), strained muscle, or possibly kidney stones, but not likely.
I went home, tried to rest and went to work the next day.
Friday, it was worse, but manageable.  
As the day went on, it got worse and worse.  I couldn’t sit, couldn’t stand, could hardly walk, and looked like I was tilted to the right.
By joint consensus of Chris and my mom, I went to the emergency room, spent 6.5 hours there to be told:
you have some fluid around your liver but everything is normal, here’s some super strong pain meds.  
This is me, post IV w/ pain medicine, pre CT (somewhere between 8 pm and 11 pm):

Anyway, I am perfectly fine, and feeling so much better.  
Chris and I had some laughs:
1.  I have like no heart rate.  It is always super even, and doesn’t vary.
2.  My blood pressure is on the low side of the spectrum, once again, Chris finds it funny.
These two things substantiate what his father always teases me about:  that I have no heart.
3.  The people in the ER are crazy.  Yes, I’m in lots of pain, but my pain on a scale of 1-10 (9) is worth way more than this girls 4 (which turns out to be menstrual cramps and she still got the same pain meds as me, you wonder why people are addicted to prescription drugs??  I’ve only taken 1 pill, but I bet some people take them all).
4.  I’m not fat.  The nurse said I’m this height and that weight too, I guess I’m not fat, because you’re not.  
5.  Drawing blood = no problem; IV = problem. 
Happy Tuesday, hopefully no more hospital visits for me.  
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